Real Talk, Real Growth: The Case for Honest Feedback
September 2025
At Sierra HR, we often hear from managers who are frustrated with an employee’s unreliable attendance, or subpar performance, or lack of initiative and motivation. “What should we do?” the manager asks. Our typical follow-up: “What have you done so far? Have you talked with this employee about the problem? What was their response?” And that’s where things tend to go downhill.
For a wide variety of reasons, managers are often apprehensive about taking corrective action. Some managers think that having a “negative” conversation will put a damper on the employee’s morale (“We really don’t want to bum her out.”) Or maybe the employee is dealing with personal problems, and the manager doesn’t want to seem uncaring (“I heard he’s going through a lot at home…”) If feedback is given to an employee at all, it’s often a watered-down or sugar-coated version of the intended message.
But unclear feedback isn’t kind or compassionate. It’s confusing, and can actually prevent the employee from being successful in the job and growing with the company. Sugar-coated feedback allows the employee to continue down a path toward frustration (on both sides), a lack of job satisfaction, and possible termination. As managers, it’s our job to be both kind and clear. We should give direct, actionable information in a way that shows support and preserves the relationship. Consider these examples the next time you’re hesitant to have a tough conversation:
Instead of: “You’re doing great, just a few little things to tweak.”
Say this: “You’ve made strong progress. Let’s look at your job description and talk about two specific areas that still need work.”
_ _ _ _ _
Instead of: “Maybe try to be a bit more proactive?”
Say this: “Moving forward, I need you to take initiative in [specific area], especially when it relates to [cite applicable company values or priorities].
_ _ _ _ _
Instead of: “Just something to keep in mind for next time…”
Say this: “This is a key area of development for your role. Let’s agree on a plan to improve it.”
_ _ _ _ _
Instead of: “Sorry, I just wanted to mention real quick…”
Say this: “I want to bring this to your attention because it’s important for your growth and success in this job.”
Feedback that is clear, direct, and growth-focused shows respect for your employee and gives him/her the best shot at success. It also supports the company’s mission, values, and goals. Good managers can offer compassion and support while also standing firm on the performance expectations of the position. This balance is what leadership is all about.
